A Nigerian singer, Iyanya, has opened up on why he hasn’t yet married a woman yet.
The 36-year-old claims that he is still single because of his fear of marriage stemming from his early experiences.
He made this known in a recent chat with popular media personality, Chude Jideonwo.
Iyanya said: “To be real here, I pray to God for a beautiful home. It’s not easy because my experiences as a child have made it difficult for me to just settle for anything.
“It’s not that I don’t want to get married or be in a serious relationship, but marriage is scary for me. At the end of the day, you just have to do it, but I don’t stop praying for a beautiful marriage and a beautiful home.”
He added that he jokes with his friends that one day someone will come out and say he has a baby somewhere.
When an ex-boyfriend got married, I was more upset than I thought I’d be. I finally had one of those moments when you discover an ex has gotten married and you’re still single, and your world momentarily collapses.
Facebook was innocently trolling my email address book looking for new users who could become my friends. Martin popped up, and when I clicked on his profile picture, I saw him looking mighty fine in a grey tux smooching some babe in a wedding dress.
Many of my exes have gotten married and the news hasn’t ruffled my feathers. Even my ex-husband has a new wife and I feel nothing but joy for him. I’ve remained buddies with most of the men who’ve been in my life, especially with the advent of Facebook.
All of these guys could get married, father a boat-load of children and be so rapt in domestic bliss that stars shoot from their ears. I’d still be able to offer them a sincere, “Yay for you!”
But not this one.
Martin was a Dutch guy working on a Master’s in political science at a Spanish university. He and I met back in 2003 after I’d moved to Madrid from New York. What started out as an expat-gone-wild fling, turned into nearly two years of off-and-on romance, mutually discovered passion, and an unearthing of one another’s souls. Martin’s presence made me re-examine my life; he became a muse and confidante.
But he was also flaky and unsure of himself, and in the end, wouldn’t be mine. Ultimately, he went back to his Dutch homeland where “real life” awaited him, leaving me bedridden with the flu, like some heartbroken maiden in a Victorian novel.
The men I dated after Martin wondered how I could be so cold, never knowing I’d been seduced and abandoned like a raging Medusa with snakes in her hair. Any man who looked at me could have turned to stone.
I’m not one of those nutty dames who try to destroy the lives of people who’ve wronged them. I’m mature enough to accept that even men who are unwilling to fulfill my romantic desires can still be friends. I’m forgiving and nice. I trip over my own shoelaces to avoid stepping on ants.
So imagine my shame upon discovering how nasty I could feel toward a person. After the breakup, I’d get messages from Holland where Martin admitted life wasn’t so swell. When he confessed to feeling lost, I was pleased. When a new romance he’d begun fizzled, I cackled like a demon.
Flash forward to 2009 when Martin had become a fond but distant memory … until I saw his wedding photo. As if the wind had been knocked out of me, I ran from the house and roamed the streets with tears streaming down my cheeks like a disoriented victim of a car crash.
Blubbering on the phone with a friend about how one of the great loves of my life had gone on to find happiness without me, I started listening to my own complaints. The conversation began with Martin, but moved on to the men I’d known since him, and ended with my feelings about my career.
Whether I was getting closer or farther away from my goals. Whether my life was rich enough to keep my creative fire burning. Whether I still liked the neighborhood I was living in, whether my friendships were supportive enough, and whether it was time to rethink my relationship with my finances.
Really, I was agonizing about everything that was supposed to have happened in my life since I last saw Martin, including finding someone I cared about as much as him. A fragment of my heart still burst knowing he was someone else’s passion or problem.
But if I was satisfied with my own world, I wouldn’t give a rat’s behind about his.
In the end, I was able to wish Martin happiness. I’m glad for him and hope he makes the best of his new life. Meanwhile, I’ve got my own work to do.
Kuami (Rockstar) Eugene has surprisingly revealed that his househelp with whom he has developed a special rapport lent her voice to his new single, ‘Single.’
The A-list star had previously revealed that he composed that song based on a personal experience after suggesting ‘broken heart’ in a previous relationship.
Speaking on Hitz FM about the surprise collabo with Mary, his domestic help, Kuami Eugene is the backing vocalist for the potential banger. He stated;
“I have to thank God for this year. I was in a toxic relationship, and it wasn’t cool for me. I had to leave. The song is moving really quickly because everyone has been in that situation before. My house help Mary recorded the backing vocals on my new single.”
In 2016, Kuami Eugene participated in season 5 of the reality competition program MTN Hitmaker, where he placed third overall. Soon after, Lynx Entertainment signed him, and he has since released a number of singles.
The highest views on YouTube for a music artist on that label in 2017 came from Angela, whose song Angela was listed as one of Ghana’s top 10 songs.
He is a featured musician on DJ Vyrusky and Shatta Wale’s song Adwenfi. He released Confusion in 2018 as a follow-up to the narrative in the song Angela.
Additionally, in response to the critical remarks he had been receiving on social media, he released the song Wish Me Well in June 2018.
Presently, he is one of the best artistes in Ghana and Africa with numerous awards and hit songs to his credit.
Ghanaian Gospel singer, Rosey is out with another soothing piece of music, dubbed Power. The inspirational singer with a gifted voice like none other, who began to embody her talent at the age of 14 years linked up with DDT for the production of this masterpiece.
Power has the trending Amapiano feel with a simple inspirational message. The song is also easy to sing along. It is basically to inspire every listener to do anything they put their minds to with the God-given Power.
According to the beautiful singer, she fasted, waited and prayed for a song that can speak to any dead situation in her life and the life of any listener and God gave her ‘Power’.
“This song is an answered prayer birthed with a conscious mind for God. My goal is as people learn the lyrics and proclaim the declaration, God indeed gives them Power to overcome every situation!” the Nagode hit maker revealed.
Rosey is currently based in Virginia(USA) serving in the Navy as a United States Enlisted Sailor. She occasionally sings the National anthem at monumental ceremonies and events. Entering into the next phase of her career she aims to touch more hearts and win souls with her craft.
The Ride or Die singer has been moving people with her live performances, at weddings, church events, charity events and even birthday parties.
Rosey available @ROSEY_MUSIQ on all social media platforms. Her music are also available on the various digital platforms.
Listen to Power by Rosey on Boomplay.
https://www.boomplay.com/share/music/108555816?srModel=WHATSAPP
Click the link below to listen to Power by Rosey.
https://bio.to/RoseyMusiQ
24-year-old Bailey Ennis has birthed a bouncing baby boy in September 2021 with the help of a sperm donor.
But what’s shocking about it is that she did it by purchasing an artificial insemination kit costing only £25.
The young woman from England seems to have been “desperate to be a mum” and “didn’t have a desire to be in a relationship”. Following the artificial insemination, she became pregnant in October 2021 and welcomed her son, named Lorenzo, on 2nd July 2022.
Bailey is currently a single parent and says that she “couldn’t be happier”.
“Having a baby by myself is the best thing I have ever done. Being a mum is wonderful and I am so happy I decided to go it alone.
“I’ve wanted to be a mum since I was a teenager and as a lesbian, I always knew it would need to be via artificial insemination. I didn’t have a desire to be in a relationship. I just wanted to have a baby.
Lorenzo is amazing and looks just like me,” she expresses.
The 24-year-old shares that she wasn’t looking for any particular features, while searching for a donor. ” I just wanted someone trustworthy and as healthy as possible,” she said.
“I found someone who had a healthy medical record and had been a donor for two others before for two LGBTQ couples.
“I found my donor and we WhatsApped and met up for a coffee before both agreeing he would be my donor. He has agreed to be my donor for as many children as I would like.
“I wanted to have blood-related siblings,” she adds.
The cost of a single artificial insemination cycle or (IUI) intrauterine insemination with a partner’s sperm is high. While legal, it can burn a hole in a person’s pocket. Although private transactions are discouraged due to safety measures, Bailey seems to have taken the risk and is now a single mum.
As I addressed in a previous post, there are various reasons men and women prefer to fly solo. But especially after a particular age, single men face unique questions.
People often speculate they must fear commitment, have been betrayed in a prior relationship, or have some type of personality disorder. Research indicates, however, that the explanation may be far more straightforward.
Notwithstanding the proliferation and popularity of dating apps, it is also true that many people enjoy the freedom and flexibility of single life.
Even many daters are reluctant to take relationships to the next level if it involves sacrificing autonomy and independence. Indeed, we all have friends who lead fulfilling lives, who seem perfectly content keeping romantic relationships at arms-length, often to the dismay of partners seeking greater intimacy.
We tend to psychoanalyze relationship-reluctant individuals as if something was “wrong†with them. What happened to them in the past? Were they abandoned in childhood? Did an ex-partner betray them? We also stereotype men as more likely to be gun-shy regarding relational intimacy or walking down the aisle.
Sometimes, relationship reluctance is indeed due to a past betrayal or broken heart. Other times, however, it is simply due to personal preference. According to research, for self-assured men, in particular, singlehood signals success and satisfaction.
Single and Satisfied: The Significance of Self-Esteem
Menelaos Apostolou and Rafaella Philippou (2022) explored the effects of self-esteem and desirable traits on the decision to remain single.ii They distinguished between involuntary singlehood, defined as people who would rather be in an intimate relationship and those who are single by choice. They investigated the link between possessing valuable traits that people prefer in a partner and self-esteem on singlehood status.
They found that self-esteem was a significant predictor of marital status for men. Higher scores correlated with a higher probability of being in a relationship or single by choice rather than involuntarily single. They found no such link between self-esteem and marital status for women.
The Deception of Desirability
Apostolou and Philippou also looked at the impact of desirable traits on relationship status. They noted that, as referenced in current literature, such traits include intelligence, good character, appearance, social status, and resource acquisition potential. The researchers observed that people who lack such qualities would find it harder to attract and retain intimate partners.
However, Apostolou and Philippou found that generally, for both genders, self-ratings of desirability did not directly predict marital status. However, some traits had significant indirect effects on men, the largest being “good looks,†where higher scores were linked with higher self-esteem, which was associated with a higher likelihood of being in a relationship or single by choice.
Avoiding Stigma or Stereotype
When considering the agenda, aspirations, or relationship potential of single men, especially men who have aged out of their younger years, we recognize that we shouldn’t stereotype or stigmatize. But we also should recognize the potential absence of ulterior explanations for resisting relationships; some self-assured men are simply single by choice.
[ii] Apostolou, Menelaos, and Rafaella Philippou. 2022. “What Predicts Involuntary Singlehood: Investigating the Effects of Self-Esteem and Having Desirable Traits in a Greek-Speaking Sample.†Evolutionary Behavioral Sciences, June. doi:10.1037/ebs0000299.supp (Supplemental).
