It’s incredibly challenging to avoid all the dangers associated with sharing a bed with a close friend.
Friendships between ex-opposites are typically great until sex enters the picture due to growing sexual interest.
“Oh, we are mature” and “it’s just sex, we can always handle ourselves,” are the well-used responses you get from people who have been going down with their friends.
The truth is that no matter how cool or mature you may feel, you can never completely avoid the risks associated with sleeping with a buddy.
Here are several uncomfortable situations and issues to think about before you do it with that close buddy.
1. When they get someone else.
So you sleep with them and a new partner comes into the picture shortly after. That awkward moment when she introduces you to the new guy as her close friend but you both know you are not just a good friend.
And then there’s the problem of that partner finding out later that he/she isn’t just your friend.
So you’re faced with confessing and losing one of your friend or partner, or facing that awkward moment when your partner confronts you with the truth that he/she found out from someone else.
Oh dear.
2. Recurrence.
The understated struggle that comes out of this kind of situation is how to minimise the ‘damage’ that has been done.
Quite a number of first-time friends sex happen in moments of rashness or uncontrolled excitement and friends would ideally love to keep it at that single time, but to continue being friends and keep the sex from recurring is one helluva difficult task you’d better avoid.
3. Opinions and judgments become questioned.
It becomes strange to go to this person, who you slept with, to talk about your heartbreaks and dating life.
It used to be normal and OK to seek their opinions before the sex happened, but not anymore. Their opinion somehow appears coloured by personal interests in you.
4. Pure intentions?
You also call their actions to question. Whatever he or she does might get interpreted as a calculated move to get back in bed with you – especially if the first time was really bomb.
5. Things won’t be the same again.
Seven out of 10 times, you won’t be able to get your friendship back to what it was before.
Once you go down that thin road, that relationship dynamic changes. Usually from good to bad.
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